God summoned President Clinton, Boris Yeltsin and Bill Gates to Heaven, and told them: "I have finally had it with all the sin in the world, and I've decided to end it in five days. I want you to go back and tell the people so they can prepare for the end."
President Clinton thereupon went on National TV and announced: "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that there IS a God. The bad news is that He's going to end the world in five days."
President Yeltsin also went on TV. "I have some bad news and some even worse news", he solemnly declared. "The bad news is that there IS a God -- and the even worse news is that He's going to end the world in five days."
Bill Gates, for his part, took to the Internet via Microsoft's ultrasophisticated internal communications system. "I have some good news and some even better news", he said. "The good news is that God thinks I'm one of the three most important people in the world. And the even better news is that now we don't have to debug Windows 98!"
-- Debbie Morris
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